Arrival and Departure

 

Yesterday, I attended the funeral of my husband’s aunt- Crescentia. 

She had Down syndrome, but in every sense, she was a true angel—full of life, always smiling, and bringing joy to everyone she encountered. She was the light of every gathering. Her favourite song was "In the morning by the sea" and she had given 'hatke' nicknames to each of her loves ones. 

Crescentia's funeral, much like her life, was a peaceful and heartwarming event. It was a serene and a comforting gathering, unlike what one might imagine for such a solemn occasion. There was laughter amidst the tears, stories of happier times. The family came together, setting aside past misunderstandings. Relatives travelled from across the globe to be there. It was a moment of togetherness, love, and unity—something that death seems to have the power to bring about.

This experience made me reflect on something profound: we are not present at two of the most significant events in our own lives—our birth and our death. 

Both birth and death require significant planning. Baby shower, naming ceremony, and other religious ceremonies are meticulously planned, just like funerals, memorials other rites and rituals at the end of life. These events involve different sets of people—those who welcome us into the world and those who send us off. Strangely, we have no control over each of the events, we also have no control or clue on people involved or present in it. Even though those are the most defining moments of our life. 

Perhaps... that’s the beauty of it. 

We may not have a say in the planning of our arrival or departure, but we can decide how we’ll be remembered. In Crescentia's case, her life was one filled with smiles, songs, and simple joys. She made a lasting mark on all who knew her, a reminder that even those who live with what some might call 'limitations' have the ability to leave behind boundless love.

The beginning and the end are merely the anchors, but the true essence of life lies in the journey in between. We often strive for more, trying to control the future and shape a structured life. While that has its value, we must constantly remind ourselves that we won’t be there to witness the final destination of our lives. So, let’s embrace the present and live each moment wholeheartedly—these are the only moments we truly control.

Sharon. 

Rest in peace Bulla.